F U C K E D U P C O L L E G E K I D S ------------------------------------------------------- - t h e p o e t r y v e n t u r e - ------------------------------------------------------- Poetry is reflection, like looking deep into the still waters of a lake, powers of emotion set like the ripples that form, from the light touch of a breeze to the force of a rock being dropped. -------------------------------------------------------- nom what's in a name you ask? far from divine, it begs why not what culture has deemed so much wrong we go tiptoing through life, trying.. not to disappoint not to let down not to.. my ruling passion is spilled out in name name with no apparent explanation silently damn one for bearing my cross it's so much more though with my name comes admission acceptance embracing unto no other can i pass those weights doomed to verbal crucifixion seeking escape but not knowing mindless incoherent sleep made thought still no escape mea culpa let me burn now, for i have taken my pain in your presence mea_culpa I feel that as I am living I am stuck in a place that has been given To me by the system so I ask you to listen What system is this which tells us what to write and obey It's all to hard to understand so a pawn we play. Believing information given from a faulty source Whose words they were written There lies the tomb that is your prison Seek the knowledge for yourself don't belive what you've been taught To you a mind has been given Through the life you've been livin' Use your thoughts to create to try to leave this place Make one better for all Don't accept the fall Use your gifts you posses to fulfill all your dreams Ignore the roadblocks ahead don't accept defeat We all understand that there is a better way The challenge to take is making change stay Fix what you can and you will feel alive So the children you know find it easier to survive Time is our enimy a force we can not resist So we must act now so that life will persist Evolution means change and we evolve every day Keep your god as thy guide and they will so you the way M1z4ru What was it again? Who was i to defend, beliefs I couldn't believe. When the only one fooled, is the easiest decieved. Once I found myself, trapped between these lies. Caught inside religion, hoplessness diguised. I tried to find hope, in life eternally. Logically concluding, it's imposssible to be. Finding strength to be free. building my integrity, prompted me to believe, that I can believe in me. levi vision A vision - instant darkness madness rambles in my head A thought - then comes another and a third more even mad ! Desire - Destroy - Decapitate I hesitate a second Deep inside for freedom fights the demon i had chained Raw emotion - under wicked skies I hear how loud it cries and howls still yet i deny ! A million voices - all a sudden scream a dream - I hope it might not be This evil little demon seems just to be breaking free just to be breaking free voices - in my head eternal Dying - not just dead over and over and over and over the vision 23rd June 1998 vision Ripclaw Memory of You Laying on the bed. Closed eyes, arms reaching outwards, I reach for you, smelling and feeling you near. Upon the waves of the air, your soft scent lingers. The warm-ness of your body, against mine. Softness of your caresses, move gently across my skin. Opening my eyes, then letting go, I see you are not there. The images of you and I, blur together and disappear. Within the surrounding air, I hear only my breath. There is no one against my body, or touching me in any way. Shaking my head, dismissing the past, I get up and out of bed. Turning the knob, I ask to not be robbed. Robbed of my sanity, from the madness of the vacuity. Swirling about me, the currents of emotions and air. Turning around, raindrops pour down over the window. Watching what I wish for, since dreams seem to always fall apart. Thank you for granting me that night. - Kamira November 4, 1998 I'm angry and I like it I am raging and the bulls step aside. I've been torn to pieces left in shambles. Millions of jagged fragments that once Made up a whole. I am not searching for adhesive I don't want to be "fixed" I am in a state of complete nothingness. Emotions diminished without value or consideration I act when I feel motion, quivering from the Tips of my toes and slowly reaching my mind Bypassing the place where my heart used to lie. You say I am hiding, you say I am afraid Afraid to feel afraid to pretend any of this is real It is not fear that binds me It is the absence of it that keeps me grounded. Throw caution to the wind you say. The wind will throw it back on a bleak winters day. That doesn't scare me, i've been Through that door and endured the pain It's a path I'm familiar with. The unknown is the greatest hindrance, You claim you can see past the barricade You know inside the rigid surface Lies fragile, breathing flesh. With your puckering lips you starve for replenishment. I have nothing left to give, like a mother's milk sucked dry. I am empty, hollow, broken. So either except the empty canvas or continue searching for one you can fill with a spectrum of colors That will dance just for you. Responsive to the stroke of your brush. The paint doesn't stick to my shell. Nothing can make this blank space beautiful Not even you with your many talents. Bluerose ------------------------------------------------------- E D I T O R S: jericho@dim.com, geekgrl@attrition.org ------------------------------------------------------- to receive new issues via e-mail, send mail to majordomo@attrition.org with "subscribe poetry". if you do not have FTP access and would like back issues, send a list of missing issues and they will be sent. ------------------------------------------------------- A V A I L A B I L I T Y: AnonFTP: FTP.DIMENSIONAL.COM/users/jericho/FUCK/POETRY WWW: http://www.attrition.org/~poetry ------------------------------------------------------- (c) Copyright. All poems copyright by original author. ------------------------------------------------------- F O U N D E D: October 30, 1997